upsetting day

Hello!

Yesterday i had no calories today i had about 600ish maybe alittle less.

Anyways i got in a huge fight with my dad. And when he came in to talk to me he would not listen. I hate him. He makes me feel like shit every day. I dont know what to do anymore. Right now my only choices seem to be move in with a another family member or kill myself.

My mothers not as bad. Ya at times she make me want to stab her but its not and everyday thing. I can live with her better then him. She wouldnt be happy is i moved out. It would kill her if i killed myself.

Just dont know what to do anymore. I have to wait til im 18 and even then if i dont have the money i cant move out.

Goals:

Lose 20 pounds befor school

get a job and start saving for a place.

get to 120 before Christmas


Thats all for now

Planning on keeping my cal limit to 450 today and the rest of the week. Next week 400 and then 350 after that. Then im just going to fast.

-Brit

Broken

Hello, Friends

Long time i know. On my period so i have been eating alot. Then again I'm a fat ass so i always eat lot. Period or not Dizzy or not I'm starting my fast. I've been real lazy about it to. I always give in lately. Lost it all with in an hour. Whats wrong with me. Why cant i be strong like i was before. I don't want the food and i know it. But i just shove it in.

Even with a fast id be lucky to lose 20 pounds before school picture day. better then staying the way i am. Ten pounds yes 15 most likely but 20 is a no. Hoping i can lose 25 before mom takes me pants shopping.  It will be tight but if i don't eat and work out alot i could lose 25 before school starts I'm going to try and get pants that are alittle tight to so i dong have to worry about getting new pants for a month at lest. I want to be pretty and thin but i dont think it will work out well. think they will know if i lost weight. most likely not. Its ok.

Im moving so i wont be posting for sometimes.

-Brit


PS. This is my new blog for those of you who are from my old one (Alice is me)

Heyo!

Hello Friends!

I have not post in sometime. I'm so sorry.

So tomorrow is day one of my fast. But I'm getting my period here soon so I'm not sure how well it will go over. Haven't weighed in in some time so I'm not sure of my weight. Ill check it on Friday if i don't get my period.

School starts back up on Aug 23. I want to lose 20 pounds before back to school night.Back to school night is when you get your pictures taken for you ID card and your locker and that classes you'll be taking. Iv been using Crest 3D white and its work really well so ill have a pretty smile. I just need a smaller body. I cant wait but i wish i had more time. 20 pounds doesn't seem like a lot. I have at lest 25 days before the Back to School night for sure but I don't know. 20 is my goal 30 is my want. Just got to be really strong these next few weeks. Anyways!


Pretty people!

- Brit

Failed

Intake= 485

Hello Friends!

I did on i was at 403 before i sat in front of some chips.....Wasnt that many inthe bag so i thought "maybe just a little." Ya ended up over 100 calories planed. I burned about 150 cals today.

Tomorrow we are going to aim for 350 again. Also i want to find some tea. Hoping the store and mint or something cause that sounds so good.

Six pictures today to make up for yesterday!


Tip: If you know your going to binge on something take it OUTSIDE to throw it away. Or somewhere you want that you wont got back into.

-Brit

Another day another fail

Hello! friends

So iv only been eating about 600 calories a day and the going on a walk that burns about 100. And i gained a pound. Could it be water weight? I'm not sure. So today i had about 450ish most likely less but better safe the sorry and walked around the mall for a good 45 mins (125 cal burned). Tomorrow i'm going to go for 350ish and hopefully burn at lest 250 off before mother gets home.

Speaking of Mother. I found her blog on her computer.( I found blogger before her and have another account but i wanted to start a new one.) Read some of her posts. Its nice to know that im not the daughter she dreams of. She wants a perfect family that goes on bike ride. A daughter who has her friends over more often and spends time with the family. Who goes on walks and eat breakfast with everyone Evey morning. Something that's not me. That i can't be. Makes me feel like i failed. Not just her but everything. I'm not perfect and she doesn't love me as much as she would if i was. It makes me wish i could tell her something. Tell her how much iv tried. How much i cried hating myself for not being perfect. How i have starved and how i have cut. How much i hurt trying to make her happy. Not being able to be myself. Cause if i did I'm scared i would hurt her.


Is it selfish to want to be happy at the risk of other being hurt?

Sorry i cant upload pictures wont let me for some reason. Ill make up for it



-Brit

July 4th

Intake=650

Hello Friends

This is going to be really short just cause I'm stupidly tired. I did OK today i must have burned 200 cals easily most likely more but I'm not sure.

Tip: If you want something really bad then just take two or three bits of it. That way you taste it and your less likely to binge of the whole thing later. Remember 30 calories of a couple bites is better then 3000 calories of the whole thing.

-Brit

I Like Fasting

Hello, Friend!

my one follower! Welcome!

I'm not the best at fasting though. I will be on day two of my fast and my Father gose out for fast food. I will always say "No thanks I don't want anything" and he gets me stuff anyways. Makes me mad! I cant just throw it out and he is going to want me to eat it with him and mom. BUT! my moms on a 600 cal diet. So I am going to try fasting starting monday and see how it works. If not then im going on a 400 cal diet with a burn of 800 cal. (always burn twice the amount you eat or try to).

Fourth of July! Hello Red White and Blue! Hope everyone has a nice holiday.


Tip: eat a salad before every BIG meal. They have little calories and will make you feel fuller faster. I find this one handy for family dinner and stuff like that.

-Brit

(sorry if i already posted a picture new computer and little thinspo I'm going hunting for more to night thought!)